Category: Love

Grateful to Love

A friend came by to help us ready for winter. He’s a young Amish gentleman and we have shared laughter and good wishes for a few years now. He mentioned he would be traveling to celebrate Thanksgiving and I asked, “What foods do you have for your meal?” “Turkey most often”, he replied. And I thought about it a bit and asked, “Do you tell stories of Pilgrims and Indians?” “No”, he said. “Me either”, I said, and then added, “I must be a bit Amish”…and we laughed.

We had many sweet conversations that day as we puttered about moving wood and fencing, and getting the barn ready for the sheep to winter. He was brave enough to have his first taste of curry as we sat to eat our lunch, and liked it enough for seconds. He spoke about his new bride and how happy he is in his new life. I could feel his joy. It was infectious. I read to him a note of thanks that I had received and he smiled.

We talked about how good it would be if all people could respect each other in their differences and delight in their similarities. And once again I marveled at the ease of speaking to another human being who cherishes life first and foremost.

As the day wore on I felt our kinship grow and was grateful for the brief times we share. While driving home he made note of, and thanked me for, slowing down as I came upon a horse and buggy. “Too many people don’t take the time to slow down”, he said. “I know”, I said. “We too often forget there is precious life there.”

The silences in our conversations are laden with communication.

And he is one of the many people I am very grateful to love.

 

Best wishes in this season of wonder and gratitude.

Love Conquers

It’s time to change the narrative. You know, the stories of our lives; the beliefs that were handed to us and go unchallenged. The fabrications of falsehoods devised to divide.

There are some real perks to rural living. One is the solitude that comes from the physical distance of other people – the good, the bad and the ugly. The downside to rural living is our ability to avoid anyone or anything that challenges the comfort zone of beliefs we commonly share. This isolation into sameness often drives me to discover a different glimpse of humanity.

Our Winding River library system carries a wide variety of important films. I was grateful to borrow the 2018 film “The Hate U Give”. This American drama is based on a novel by Angie Thomas and directed by George Tillman, Jr.

In the movie we are given the opportunity to witness a black teen exist between two worlds: a white suburban high school she attends and her home in a predominantly black and poor neighborhood.

It would be very easy to reduce this clash of two worlds to sound bites, but the written artistry, superb directing and passionate acting present viewers with complex themes in a human touch.

Tupac Shakur and his message of “Thug Life” play a central theme in the movie. We’re invited to explore Tupac’s explanation of the meaning of “thug” in these, his edited words, “The Hate U Give Little Infants, “Effs” Everybody.”

This is a movie that explores hate but is triumphant in love.  And that is profound in a world insistent on division.

My advice? Rent the movie. Take time with it and make sure to engage the extras on the menu. Look at life from another’s point of view. Take time to see how hate destroys, but love conquers, and then, let’s change the narrative.

 

 

photo from Wikipedia

Choose Clarity

What’s the dirtiest part of the human body? I know what you are thinking, but traditional people will tell you the dirtiest part of the body is the head. That’s due to uncontrolled thinking that can lead to depression and despair, anger and hate. To some, the washing of the hair and the head when done with intention and care, is a sacred and loving act.  It’s designed to help a person rid unwanted and nagging thoughts. Intention and love are indeed powerful weapons in ridding darkness.

The Chinese also have this saying or so I have been told, “You can not keep the birds from flying around your head, but you can keep them from nesting there.” This appears to be another way of combating nasty thoughts. It implies two very important concepts: One is that you cannot stop the thoughts from coming to you and two is that while you cannot stop them, you still can choose what will alight upon you.

Fear based thinking is loaded with dark thoughts. And our culture is currently loaded with fear-based thinking. Not surprisingly our darkest thoughts generally cast aspersions on others while allowing our own nasty inclinations to go unabated.

Let’s face it we’re all plagued with this “devil” within.

But what if we take some tips from old wisdom? What if we choose to ignore the rumblings of our lessor selves and seek clarity instead of confusion? What if love and good intention can keep the birds of prey from nesting on our heads?

Bad habits can be reversed.

I heard an old friend and teacher, Prem Rawat, sum it up this way, “Our thoughts are a gift to us… but what we choose to think about is a gift we give ourselves.”

Open the gift of clarity. It is closer than we think.

 

Big Thanks to WDRT for airing these 2 minute commentaries, “Consider This”, every Thursday, 5:30pm CST. Community Radio. Support it.

 

Love of Place

Every apple seed can produce an entirely unique tree. Every tree has a story to tell and there is so much to learn. I have the pleasure of living in an heirloom apple orchard. It delights the senses throughout the seasons, it informs and it nourishes; its beauty has captured my heart…All of this has caused me to ponder the significance of love of place.

We cannot all stay in the place of our birth. My maternal grandmother left a beautiful seaside town on the west coast of Italy to come to the United States. And while I am sure she missed the sea, the foods and flora of her home, she taught me through her actions the importance of love of place. Well into her 70’s she tirelessly cared for her garden, her chickens and her bread with a gratitude to the land that allowed it all to be.

The people of the Bahamas are now beginning the struggle to rebuild after the destruction of Dorian. The people of the Amazon who have been displaced by intentionally set fires are forced to uproot. Throughout the world migrants traveling by sea and by foot are being forced to leave their homes. It is through my own love of place that I can possibly understand their grief and their uncertainty.

Love of place. For those of us who live by the fruit of the earth we are inexplicably bound to her. Love of place is essential to our well being and it is hard to comprehend living without it.

Many of us have lost this relationship to land and I suggest to you that it may well be the cause of much of the disharmony and disrespect that we witness today.

Science now tells us that we need more time in Nature. This is something that our hearts have always known.

 

 

The Heart Breaks Free

“What will they say when they realize there is no hell?” These were the words a reverend told me, when I asked him to help someone who was dying and who feared the wrath of hell. I had told him, “Your church put the fear there and now your church needs to take it away”. His response told me that he was the person to help her, but it also carried the irksome reminder of the folly of faith.

Faith born of knowing does not require a middleman – or woman. Knowing is sufficient unto itself. So this threat of hell or the promise of heaven has not held much sway with me, once I set my sites on the need to know and not simply believe.

I have been having chats with people who consider themselves to be “religious”. It has been revealing. In the quiet one-to- one of conversation they express doubts and concerns about their chosen faiths. They will even express doubts that only “true believers” will make it to the pearly gates. And that is common sense.  Knowing someone and witnessing their kindness and enjoying their friendship, makes it hard to condemn them to an afterlife that may or may not exist.

The kindness we offer and the gratitude we feel are the wind in the sails of our hearts.

And hearts are designed to be free.

This past week Wisconsin lost a warrior of peace. He was not famous except to those who passed him on the street with his anti-war signs and his “veterans for peace” vest. Those of us, who put peace before war, loved him; for Lars lived what he knew, and he walked his talk.

Death is a great teacher and reminds us of this: We have this moment called now. Make the most of it.

 

 

The peace photo came from Lars facebook page as did the quote below. To know and not simply believe is the challenge.

“Sometimes war may become the only resort available, but never try to justify it, by saying that it’s the right thing to do, because war is never the right thing to do, no matter how right you feel. When you fire that first shot, no matter how right you feel, you have no idea who’s going to die – you don’t know whose children are going to scream and burn – how many hearts will be broken – how many lives shattered – how much blood will spill until everybody does what they are always gonna have to do from the very beginning – sit down, talk and try to understand each other beyond the petty little differences born from instinctual tribalism.” 
― Abhijit Naskar, Fabric of Humanity

Engaging Love

Let’s begin by acknowledging that there are many horrible things happening. Federal concentration camps; children removed from families; the dropped charges of the police murder of Eric Garner; and closer to home, Monroe County’s legal counsel informed us that a referendum to halt sand mining would not hold up in court…

These are but a few of the leaps ignorance has taken of late. It can knock the wind out of the sails of anyone trying to respect the planet or to be kind to one another. And yet, that is exactly what we must continue to do.

There are many more people engaged in doing Good than the alternative. Clearly that is true or we would have imploded long ago. And while the threat of ignorance is very real, it is all the more reason for us to carry on.

Lots of people call for indignation and outrage to fight back. OK, if that is how you source yourself, have at it, but for me I have a need to call upon Love. Love for the Earth, Love for my ancestry, Love for those yet to be born…these are compelling reasons to engage in life and to work towards a more humane and peaceful world.

We cannot turn back the clock to undo the harm that our society and our government have created, but we can stand together in Love to ensure that ignorance no longer wins.

We must act consciously to unravel the threads of hatred that have wound their way into our lives. We must ignore the fear that would hold us back from speaking truth to power.

And this I know: freedom from fear, the courage to act, the conscious refusal to be a puppet of hate can only come from an unwavering allegiance to Love.  Let it be.

 

Seasons of the Heart

As we find ourselves in the peak of summer, I revel in the transient greenery that now engulfs this land we call the Driftless. I have lived here in the magic of the seasons for seventeen years.

They say, “Home is where the heart is,” and I must tell you it has been quite easy to find my heart and my home here.  Notions of caring for the land, or stewarding the land, have given way to the understanding that the land is also caring for me. It is a symbiotic relationship and one that I am grateful to have.

We have been taught we hold dominion over the Earth, and this fool’s notion has driven us to cause great harm to everything living, including ourselves. We parade the words, “In God We Trust” as we glibly destroy the Creation. I know no other way out of this horrible nightmare but to celebrate the Beauty and the finite nature of this home we call Earth. And this is nothing less than an act of Love.

I often recall this passage on Love from Kahlil Gibran’s “The Prophet”: “When love beckons to you, follow him, though his ways are hard and steep”, and he reminds us, “…even as Love is for your growth it is also for your pruning.”  Gibran paints a harsh journey and seals it with this: “But if you seek only … Love’s pleasure, it is better that you pass from Love’s door…into the season less world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter and cry, but not all of your tears.” End of quote.

Home is where the heart is and it is where the seasons dance. It’s our choice to dance, too. The rhythm of Love is beckoning.

 

“Home is where the heart is,” is a quote from Pliny the Elder a naturalist and author, born 23 AD in Como Italy. His full name was Gaius Plinius Secundus.

photo is Margaret’s off grid home at Echo Valley Farm, Wisconsin.

You can listen to this on Soundcloud.

Thanks to WDRT for continuing to air “Consider This” every Thursday at 5:28 pm CST.

And for more on the Driftless, visit Driftless Now.

Bring Love to Desperate Times

In these times that seem so desperate, I reflect upon the life of my Grandmother, Josephine Paparella, who came to this country at the age of sixteen searching for a better life. She married a hometown sweetheart, Anthony Mignanelli and began a family in Pennsylvania. Within months after bearing their eighth child her husband was killed, leaving her alone to raise the children through the Depression. She grew the family’s food and baked bread in an outdoor oven selling it to make ends meet. She did this with the support of family and community, but she also did it against mounting pressures of a society fearing immigrants and a government who thought it best to take her children away.

She fought to keep her children and she won. Much of this I learned after she had passed.

What I knew of her was that she loved me. What I know is that she did not express remorse for her lot in life. She cared if I was warm and fed. She cared about her children, the garden and her neighbors. What I know is that she taught me about  determination and will through her actions.  What I know is that she did her best. I have heard that she used an Italian expression very often. It loosely translated to this: “If everyone were to leave their troubles in the middle of a room, you would pick your own troubles and carry on.”

She carried on. She endured. And I carry her legacy proudly.

These are desperate times, but the solutions remain in front of us. Love. Carry your burdens with dignity and hope. Work to make it better, not just for yourself, but also for everyone. We have fallen prey to the worst the human spirit offers. Now it is our turn to rise to the best. I remembered my Grandmother today as I awoke to a new reality before me. The floods and constant rain have made it a desperate time here. It is much the same or worse in many places throughout the world. I refuse to be desperate. As long as I have a heart full of love, as long as I give myself to appreciation for this life and for the Good that continues to find me, I am at peace.

Armed with peace, we will be able to make a way out of no way. Arm yourself with peace, my friends, and roll up your sleeves. There is work ahead. Remember those who came before you and work for those yet unborn. Let love win.

You Need Us.

It seems the Supreme Court has decided to weigh in on bigotry. A baker has won the right to not bake for a gay wedding. And now intellectuals are busy trying to tell us why the decision is OK.

Well, I grew up during the time when people like me were forced to meet in the shadows. I witnessed the sadness, the retreat to bars and alcohol and drugs, and the shunning of family. I watched as police arrived at the nightclub and were handed a sack of money to keep them from shutting the place down or beating up the patrons. I lived through Ronald Reagan’s ignorance over AIDS that cost the lives of young gay men… and I am here to tell you none of it was OK.

This recent salt to the wound, in the name of religion, will not be ignored by those of us who know better. The insistence to divide humanity is only working for the self-righteous. Human beings are capable of much more than this.

No amount of intellectualism can hide the stench of bigotry. No amount of legal wrangling can change the course that those brave Queens and Lesbians carved for us at Stonewall on June 28, 1969.

And who is this “us”? We are your sons, daughters, your clergy and politicians. We are two spirited at our best and made sickened by your disgust at our worst. How you treat us is indicative of how you look upon yourself: your secret passion to fit in, your secret loathing of anything that challenges your sameness. We will not return to your shadow. You need us.

So I am not celebrating this unwise decision to uphold ignorance by the Supreme Court. But I will continue to honor the gift of my Creator to be the unique person that I am, and I will surely not surrender my ability to be kind, even in the face of such vile hatred masked as religion.

To those who are different, I say, “Come out come out wherever you are”. Let Love win. Light will always trump darkness. Don’t despair. We got this.

 

This piece aired on WDRT‘s “Consider This” on June 7.

You can listen on Soundcloud.

Photo compliments of Wikipedia Commons.

The Dream Continues

There are many reasons to celebrate this time of year. The lengthening of days, the brilliance of stars, the hitting of the refresh button with the turn of the Gregorian calendar…the strengthening of hope that we can make it all just a little better, beginning with each resolution and echoing out.

In the midst of all of these reasons for us to get it right, January is a fine month to celebrate the life of a man who challenged the status quo of racism and the ignorance of war. A man whose words and actions still inform us and shine the light of hope. For all the time that has passed and all the inhumanity that has persisted, the fervent will of Martin Luther King continues to reach us.

And this is as it should be. It is never to late to cultivate a will of love.

There are many today who criticize the man for having human faults. But I think it is not the man, but the wisdom, that we need.

If in remembering his words, his actions and his sacrifice, a fire is rekindled towards peace, kindness and good will, what harm is there in that?

This season will move swiftly on and the business of spring planting, tax time, elections and other worldly activities will take center stage. Our challenge is to hold onto the spirit of this time, regardless of what comes.

We are here to help one another. We are here to experience peace and to share Good times even in the hard times. We are here to love.

Anything less, my friends is not part of our birthright, anything less is not part of The Dream. Yes, let us begin again. With renewed vigor let us write a new story. We are alive… we still have time to get it right. And yes, it is a worthy effort.

I will leave you with theses words of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. : “If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl, but whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”

 

 

This piece aired on WDRT’s Consider This, Thursday, January 25. You can listen to it on soundcloud.

You can hear more about the life of Dr. King and a see clips from a new HBO documentary about King’s last years, titled “King in the Wilderness,” on Democracy Now. which also aired Thursday January 25.